Dear Five Faces: My partner is Water – or at least I suspect he is. He seems to have totally frozen on me; I can’t get through to him, he seems withdrawn and is totally unable to communicate. I don’t know what to do. I suspect I’m an Earth Element, so how can I unfreeze him? Thank you and looking forward to hearing what you have to say.
Dear Earth: It is very possible your partner is a Water who’s in an uncommunicative phase. This can be because of either too much or too little Water energy; with Waters, it can look the same sometimes. Too little Water will look like a lack of flow (remember, balanced Waters are inspired, go with the flow people), but too much Water can cause a person to sink beneath the weight of the Water and go deep instead of flowing. Either way, it’s no flow.
It’s an interesting fact that whenever we’re out of balance, we automatically try to balance ourselves even without knowing we’re doing it. That means the clue to what’s going on for your partner will be in the behaviors you mention. You say he is frozen, which is interesting because when Water is in an excess state (too much Water), what they need is structure. Without help, the only way a Water can create structure themselves is to freeze – ice is as solid as Water can get, yet it prevents its characteristic flow. So the way to help your partner is to provide gentle structure, and we would look to the Control Cycle to do that. What controls Water? It’s Earth; the nature structure to hold and guide a river is an earthen riverbank. That makes you the perfect person to help him out.
Besides standing in a place of compassion for him, you might try nurturing him a bit more than usual, maybe extra cuddles, fixing his favorite foods, whatever you know means nurturing to him. But do this gently, you don’t want to smother him; Waters needs their alone time. Good luck, and let us know how it goes!